What do you think? Should I forgive and forget or find new a batch of buddies?

I believe that you should forgive your friends but do not forget, also find a new group of friends. Sure go to the cabins this weekend but express how you feel. You and your friends are old enough to have discussions among one another to resolve and issue. If you forgive them, there would be less of a guilty feeling on your shoulders. In the end you did your part and if they wanted to discuss your situation they have every right because you did tell them. Even though you and your friends are close, they should be comfortable enough to come to you and talk about how they feel because you told them about what was going on with you and your girlfriend. I also feel you should get a new group of friends because time has passed and the old friends are not hitting anymore. Yes you are older but it is time to branch out and see what is new in the world. New friends come with opportunities and opinions, although they may have something to say about what you may have told them.

My response and the authors compare in that we both chose the response that he and his friends should speak about the situation and he is able to express his feelings. The author tells him to keep those friends and I said the opposite because I feel they may have had the best interest but not it is time for him to explore new options; there is nothing wrong with branching out to see whats out there. I feel that I am more straight forward when it comes to my response whereas the author goes into detail. I notice the author using using pathos by telling him that his friends talked about him out of love and her own personal example to appeal to him. Also she used ethos in order for him to understand why his friends may have talked about him behind his back.

The ending of the essay describes the Cheryl Strayed’s mothers’ final moments. She is able to see just how her mothers life ended but not painfully. As her mother dies she mentions her eyes, stating that they never closed ” Daggers of blue wanting and wanting. To stay, to stay.” but how her mother longed to be here longer. Maybe her mother was not ready to die but her body was ready. The daughter gives a brief feeling of what she felt when she used heroin and how it relates to seeing her mom die. But it also shows their relationship because she was always by her mothers side in life and during her final days. In a way, the ending pertains to her relationship with Joe because of how she was describing her mother when she died was something that she felt with Joe, and he was the one to make her feel that way after the heroin. This connects to the title because her mother was the heroine in her life due to always being together and the way she died but the drug heroin helped her cover up the pain she was feeling, the loneliness.

When the sister left the note to the brother about him being in the house alone, it showed the relationship between the siblings. That then leads to a sentence about how if he was left alone he could burn down someones house. Also when the sister was attempting to use code when speaking to her brother about where she left the key so that no one knew where it was, showed how serious she may have been about not letting anyone know where the key was but in the end she was using the codes to be funny.

The relationships compare to others in that they have a special bond but there is some push back in their relationship. The mother seems to be the only one that can care for her son. As stated in the episode, his mother said that everyone makes mistakes because while in the care of others he has nearly died several times but she is the only one that can truly take care of him. As much as the son lives his mother he feels that it is time to move on and be an adult. The son got addicted to pain medicine and his mother slowly winged him off because she cares for her son and his life. Without the help of his mother, he would probably not be alive.

Escape for the main character (the son) is him living on his own with out the supervision of his mother and having the finances that the government gives him. He is 26 so he would like to move out of his mothers house and be independent without having to rely on her. The sons motivation is wanting to live his life. For the mother it could mean being there for her son while also having freedom herself because when she was given time away to not care for him, she did not know what to do. Her son, his life, and safety motivates the mother to be over protective. Also for the girlfriend, escaping could be getting away from negative people who criticize her for dating someone like her boyfriend. She wants to be with him but maybe without the supervision of his other. In the end the mother has the most power because she will always feel she has to be there to take care of her son because no one is able to do the same. She would not know what to do when he’s gone and does not feel that anyone else would be able to care for him the same due to many near death experiences that have occurred with her son.

The title of the story “Under the Influence” makes me automatically think about someone that drinks. Throughout the story it mentions how the children were affected by the fathers decision along with the spouse. I wonder how the author was able to incorporate the feelings of the kids while not getting too involved by telling more about the kids. The story is told from the point of view of the oldest child, which allows readers to see his experience. His children and wife were neglected due to his decision. Why might the author want to keep his addiction a household secret? It is fundamental that the readers know how the wife and children were mistreated due to an addiction they had no control over. It’s interesting knowing the father never cared about his impact on the wife and children he left around at such a young age. The story is deep textually, in the sense that readers may be able to strongly relate with the situation and giving vivid details.

1. Jabberwock (n) dragon
2. Beamish (adj) brave
3. Frabjous (adj) fabulous day
4. Brillig (adj) sunny
5. Slithy(n) slimy
6. Toves(n) toes
7. Gyre (v) sway
8. Gimble (v) glide
9. Wabe (adv) wind
10. Mimsy (adj) loose
11. Borogroves (n) limbs
12. Mome(v) mom
13. Raths (v) was
14. Outgrabe (adv) outraged

“And hast thou slain the dragon?       

Come to my arms, my brave boy! O fabulous day! Callooh! Callay!”       

He chortled in his joy. ’Twas sunny, and the slimy toes     

  Did sway and glide in the wind: All loose were the limbs,    

   And the mom was outraged.

The phrase “one hand washes the other” foreshadows the essay. It allows readers to obtain a better understanding of how when you do for someone, they do for you. But it’s more of a exchanged favor and not expected. People often wash the hands of other without them knowing but it’s like a respect thing. In the essay “one hand washing the other” pertains to the undertaker getting divorced and Milo helping him by charging a set price for laundry. The author knew that he was in a situation and exchanged the favor. Helping someone out that had helped him.

Lynch argues that our relationship with death is one that many have a hard time coping. Also that death even when expecting is not something that can be prepared for. People fear death because sometimes it comes all of a sudden and is not suspected. Death for some is something that frightens and at times should not be talked about. I agree with his argument because we all have to face death one day even though we do not want to lave certain things behind. Once death has occurred there is nothing to reverse it and that tends to scare the living or someone that could be experiencing it.

“Years ago when I was a graduate student… of animals internal clocks.”

This quote relates to the hermit crab’s symbolism in that the author studied behaviors of animals and already has some experience. She studied animals while in school. The behavioral aspect represents how the crabs responds to certain things. Also it’s behavior throughout the story.

“In my life I’ve had frightening losses and unfathomable gifts: A knife in my stomach.”

The symbolism this quote has to the hermit crab is that it continues to move. The crab has losses when it has to change shells because the shell is what protects it form the outside. The crab is also given the gift of being taken care of and someone relating as though they have the experiences that the crab may have. Another gift is how the crab is collected at the beach and given a new option of shell to now live in. Without the shell the crab would die.

Grealy wants readers to have own their image and perspective of a mirror before she starts to tell her story. She does this so that the reader has background knowledge as to maybe why she would use comparisons of a mirror. She then adds disguises of herself to the story by altering her appearance such as changing her hair and covering her face with masks during Halloween to hide who she truly is. Her discoveries about self deception and self honesty show that people view themselves one way while others may not view them that way and people are different on the outside than the inside. And if they really want to be themselves they must be true to who they are. She extends those discoveries with the people she surrounds herself with and how they view her. Also how she views herself while going through her problems. She make the observation about herself as she is sitting at a diner talking to man she finds attractive and wonders why he is talking to her and not mentioning her face. Which to the argument of the story of herself looking in the window and seeing her Reflection. Grealy says ” I existed separately from my face” while seeing her reflection sitting down talking to the attractive guy. He is genuinely having a conversation with her but not asking questions about her face. This is the big argument because Grealy is not her face. She sees herself for the first time while staring at her reflection. She is one person on the outside and her true self on the inside which some people are able to look past. Everything did not seem to be about looks but she was able to feel comfortable around him knowing he was not judging her and asking what happened to her. She finally sees herself fore the first time.

” I existed separately from my face”

The author’s main argument is to take some time for yourself, especially with what’s going on in the world today.

Solange’s lyrics are of self care because she says “you know I gotta go ahead and take some time” meaning she has to take some time off for herself in order to heal. Her lyrics are meant to heal in order to succeed and continue her journey. Allowing people to know that its time for a break. Give oneself time from what’s going on outside in the world and behind closed doors. It’s evident that people know why someone would take time off for self care.

I believe selfcare is something for everyone and that we all need because life is stressful. There are events in our lives where we need to just chill and take a day for ourselves because we deserve it. Self care helps with the mind, body, and spirit. Although it could be in a form of splurging or relaxing for a few days or weeks. Everyone’s type of selfcare is different but is well needed.